I have lots of very strong, very mixed emotions about the trip. The biggest question I have is--is it too early to leave Carson for a weekend? She'll be 3 months old when we get back. But also, is it okay that I'm looking forward to the weekend away?
What if she gets really sick?
What if it really is too early to leave her? (you can see I have delusions of being much more necessary than I actually am)
What if they run out of the milk I've been storing up for the past month and she starves?
What if Carson refuses to drink bottles from people she's not used to eating with and she starves?
What if they have to give her a bath and turn away for just a second and the unspeakable happens?
What if the refrigerator breaks and all the milk goes bad and she starves?
What if she won't stop crying for two days straight?
What if they don't know about SIDS and put a blanket in the crib with her and she suffocates?
What if she gets too hot while she's sleeping and overheats and suffocates?
What if she doesn't recognize us when we get back?
As you can see, I am a total nutcase about this. Here's why none of these things will happen while Carson is with her grandparents:
None of them are complete idiots.
Brandon's dad is a retired firefighter and EMT.
Between our parents, they have raised 7 kids, none of whom starved, drowned, or suffocated.
In my heart, I really do believe the weekend will be fine and none of us will be irreparably scarred by it :) I am really looking forward to freeing up some of the brain space that is used every moment of every day lately to anticipate, evaluate, and respond to a baby. Don't get me wrong--I love doing it, love being with her and getting to know her as a person. But this weekend, I can have a second cup of coffee without worrying if she will be up all night. I can sleep without keeping one ear and eye on alert. I can take medicine for the cold I caught from Carson without wondering if it's safe for her. And best of all, I get to spend some quality time with my wonderful and amazing husband. While we see each other every day at home, I still feel like I miss him lately--not for a lack of time spent in the same room but for a lack of focus on each other. I can't wait to hang out with him!
On another note--Brandon got a webcam for us to keep in touch while he is out of town this week. So Carson has not had to go a day without seeing her dad. It has been sooo much fun talking to and seeing Brandon while he's so far away.
I wondered if Carson would "get" it--could she see the screen, recognize his voice, etc? The answer is YES. Her biggest smiles this week have been while we are talking to Brandon. She just can't get enough of him, and I'm so glad they get to see and play with each other. Brandon and I keep getting teared up, because it's just so sweet how happy she gets--smile after precious smile.
So wish us luck--all of us:
Brandon in Vegas,
the grandparents here with Carson,
and me--somewhere in between.
2 comments:
I can't answer for Pat, but here's my "take" on why your worries are for naught....if she runs out of milk..there's always Diet Coke, Tommy or I will be holding her the entire time, so..no bath, blanket issue, overheated, etc, if she gets sick-I have Motrin, I will make sure to show her your wedding album at least once! Now, feel secure and have a wonderful time!!! I love ya.
Katie, Carson is in excellent hands. You deserve time with Brandon alone. You deserve to have some fun with Brandon alone. You two are the best of the best parents. We all know this is difficult to leave (for just a bit) your baby for the first time. However, when the two of you return, there will be new smiles from Carson and I do believe the three of you will be closer then ever! Have a wonderful time with your husband. I promise you from SC CARSON will be just fine! I love you both
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